Wendy Samson – FutureSYNC’s architect, often uses her audience’s shoulders to make a point. That point is the need for professionals to take their eyes off of themselves and realize that it’s not about you! In fact, the more quickly an employee can move from the “me mentality” to the “we mentality”, the more likely they are going to be successful in that position and be considered for promotion. If you don’t believe this, just think of those co-workers who begin a new job talking only about their own lives and families, or how things were done in their past jobs, or how much more they know than their supervisors. Those employees never last long do they?
Have you struggled to fit in, to keep a job or to feel like others consider you to be upwardly mobile? Perhaps the reason is that you are focused first on self rather than the organizational needs of the people around you.
Wendy helps her audiences to make this connection by first reminding them of the old adage that you are either listening to the angel on your right shoulder or attending to the devil on your left. She then adds a twist to this imagery. “During the day, are you operating from the “I, me, my, self-preservation” shoulder or are you working from the “we, us, our, organizational needs and outcomes” shoulder? What an important question!
FutureSYNC wants to first say that when you are just starting a job – those first couple of months – you are understandably going to spend a bit more time operating from your “me focused” shoulder. After all, you ARE trying to figure out if you are a fit, if the job is right for you, if you have what it takes, etc. But without reaching out to others at your workplace, asking them about their lives, laughing at their jokes and offering them assistance – the choice about your future in that position might not be in your hands. In fact, if by six months your language doesn’t begin to switch to “we, us, our” and your behaviors don’t reflect your commitment to your team and to the mission, values, goals and objectives of your company, then they probably never will. So start your day by asking yourself, “what shoulder am I choosing to work from today?” And begin the awareness process that results in emotional intelligence.